Confessions...

I'm still working on my personal challenge, but somehow along the way, I met a man who got me sidetracked. Well, I can't really blame him, but lately, he has been the source of much temptation. So, without the nerve or gall to tell him in person, I told him in an e-mail that I no longer wanted to see him again. But who am kidding?! If he called me now, I'd come running.

The odd thing is that just three days prior, I witnessed to him about the very thing that tore us apart. I encouraged him to go to God since it was clear that by looking for he wanted the world's way, he was getting nowhere. What would he have to lose?

Then yesterday, I was tempted by the same longing, but instead of his encouraging me the way I had encouraged him, he encouraged me to do the opposite. In a way, it's a little funny. Men are notorious for not being able to refuse to certain things. Of course, it is a myth, but humourous to consider, nonetheless.

I'm sitting there waiting for him to say something contrary, like maybe we shouldn't jeopardize our friendship. And he says, "You know, I think it would be good for both of us."

"Yeah, I'll bet," I say to myself, and then he goes on to describe certain details.

When I had a few moments to reflect on my decision, that's when I began to feel the weight of it all. I felt guilty, but to save myself and my friend (though I am certain he will find someone else soon enough), I ended it all. Part of me wants to call him back.